Updated: Jul 18
I am not good at loving myself.
I know I am a person, but I can't stop thinking that maybe it's my fault.
I can't stop comparing myself to others.
If you ask any therapist what some most confessed feelings their clients have about themselves are, well, these come at the very top. These are very familiar words for you to hear. Comments that are often spoken to oneself, to your friends, or your partner. Can you relate?
Self-love and relationship
Relationships are a beautiful aspect of your life. A loving embrace from someone you love can bring about so much positivity into your life. You feel purpose, solace, and strength if your relationship is stable.
But sometimes, these relationships can take a toll on your mental health. You can be so wrapped around making it all right that you wouldn't know when you have started reducing yourself as a human. So how can you stop from going through that path? The answer is straightforward: Self Love.
It is easier said than done, but your journey of loving someone can only be fruitful if you don't stop loving yourself. Self-love is a destination. It is a way of being that needs as much attention, care, and time as your relationships.
Relationships are not meant to be perfect. The idea of an ideal relationship is unreasonable for anyone. Most of us desire to be in a relationship that does not see any changes, challenges, and seasons throughout. But is that even possible?
The idea of practicing self-love
If you ask different individuals about their theory of self-love, you will find that everyone has their idea of self-love. These days the concept of self-love is very tightly connected to self-care. For example, rituals taking any outward step, a dynamic task, etc., helps in creating a much better relationship with yourself.
Self-care is essential to maintain a steady bond and adds value and strength to self-love. But if we talk about self-care and self-love, these two concepts are connected but not the same.
For example, if we go out traveling with our friends, it is a ritual associated with self-care but does not necessarily be needed to love ourselves. Self-care is just an expansion of self-love. So, take these ideas to tend your relationship with you. Please make your own set of beliefs and go at it thoroughly.
● Spend the first couple of hours in the morning just by yourself. Make a routine that allows you to know yourself better.
● Practice yoga or meditation.
● Maintain a diary or a journal to write about your feelings and thoughts.
● Respect and honor yourself.
● Take some time away from gadgets and crowded places.
● Go for a walk alone or watch a movie on your own.
● Talk to a counselor or a professional coach to explain your thoughts if you ever feel like you need to.
● Sit and listen to music.
Practicing self-love is a journey that embarks all your life experiences and what you put into them. As you continue to walk towards achieving your goal, you may want to connect to professional support or a counselor; please reach out: https://www.liaisonit.com/thisishome
How to Develop Self-Love When You are In a Relationship?
● Maintain a degree of space and independence
It is not very healthy for a person to fully submerge themselves in a relationship. Practice your hobbies, likes, and activities that make you happy. Try to spend some time away from your partner with your friends and family and find happiness in solitude.
● Remember, you are the master of your happiness.
It would be best if you did not depend on your partner for your happiness. Your partner can only enhance the satisfaction that comes within you, but he or she is not responsible for how you view the world or for your happiness.
This can be difficult for some people who depend too much on their partners, but you can achieve your happiness if you stop thinking about a timeline or a situation that will make you happy. Instead, learn to embrace the small things in life that bring you joy, like sitting on a couch and sipping coffee while watching your favorite movie or simply meditating. This will also help to strengthen the relationship.
● Find the good in you.
There is a reason why your partner loves/likes you. Insecure people tend to dismiss them off every compliment and often look down on themselves. Try to look at yourself through your partner's eyes, and you will soon feel the confidence that will start building up in you.
● Don't lose heart when you see your flaws
Everybody has flaws, and we sometimes tend to get used to them by succumbing to our shortcomings. But sometimes, the spots that you got used to living with can irritate your partner. Don't get disheartened, and try to work on those flaws. Exposing your flaws is natural, and working on them makes you better and enhances your relationship.
● Forgive yourself for your failings.
Sometimes you do or say some things that may hurt your partner or lead to a fight, and you regret it afterward. Do not indulge in regret and hating yourself. This will come in the way of practicing self-love.
Self-love is an essential aspect of every individual's life. When you love yourself, you are more capable of making other people happy. Self-love is critical to have a healthy and stable
relationship and practicing it will bring you peace of mind, and you will also enjoy the positive, healthy space required in a connection to make it last.
About Peki therapy
Peki therapy is a psychological therapy and counseling center specialized in adolescent and adult therapy.
Lalpeki Ralte is interactive in her style, focusing on emotions by integrating complementary toolkits and intervention through online video consultation.
With an understanding of your requirements, she offers a personalized approach tailored to you and your needs to build on your strength and attain well-being and personal growth.
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